New EU chancellor

It was announced today that James Dove has won the vote with a majority of 78% in his favour.

The vote comes after Italy voiced a ‘vote of no confidence’, in the aging former chancellor, Hans Roubre.

Hans Roubre the 48 year old German from Bavaria stepped down following Italy’s vote of no confidence, his 2 years in office dogged by endless internal conflicts.

During his first speech as chancellor James Dove stated ‘this is beef…I ordered chicken.’ After throwing the sandwich trolley over a balcony he then said. ‘I’m going to open a can of whoop ass on all our problems.’

Following his speech, Mr Dove was seen chasing emo’s out of the building before throwing apples at them.

We expect a lot more from this hopeful young man.